Anniversary away

My husband and I went to Palm Springs for our 26th wedding anniversary.  It was a wonderfully relaxing time and so nice to be surrounded by new sights and sounds and smells.  I felt like a child again wanting to explore and experience someplace I hadn't been before. 

Listening

I remember as a child how important it was to me for my mom and dad to listen to whatever I wanted to tell them.  I remember the difference in how I felt when they listened and when they didn't. Because I have always made time to listen to my children, I have two grown sons that still love to tell me things every day. I think it's important to happily listen to your children when they want to tell you something - if you don't - eventually they will stop wanting to tell you things. 

Discussions

I have learned that discussing anything - movies, books, tv shows, articles, daily happenings - helps whoever is doing the discussing be able to organize their thoughts and make connections between all kinds of experiences and bits of information.  It helps people think in clearer ways and understand the world better - so it is important to discuss things with your children.

Learning

I'm really happy with how much I have learned- about learning - through my readings about unschooling.  I feel I have such a better understanding now - so far away from what I used to think.  I'm happy that even though my sons are now in college the principles that I've learned about in unschooling about relationships can even now have a positive effect in our lives. 

my path to unschooling

I pulled my boys out of school when one had finished 4th grade and the other had finished 5th grade.  They wanted to homeschool - they were no longer happy with attending public school.  A big problem that I had, though, was that I needed to keep working - even if it was only part-time.

By chance - as I was reading over our city's council notes online- I found out about a new homeschooling charter school.  I called them and set up a tour and was very impressed with what I saw.  The boys attended the school 2 days a week and they were given packets to complete at home with me each month.  They both loved the new school - it had a nice peaceful atmosphere, which was really lacking in their former school.  At the end of the school year - my oldest son decided he wanted to continue at the school, but my younger son decided there was too much busy work for him and he wanted to school at home.

So, for the next two years we pretty much did school at home.  However, over those two years we became less and less structured - we were burning out on the school at home model.  I started to think more about character and relationships and less about academics.  I wanted my boys to be happy and really enjoy everything about homeschooling.

At the end of those two years my older son finished at the charter school.  We made more friends in the homeschooling community and did group activities with other homeschoolers, went on lots of field trips and just got together with others to hang out - play games - go to the movies and other events.  I was much more relaxed about homeschooling and didn't require that the boys do any formal writing or other academic subjects.  They were allowed to choose what they wanted to study.

Somewhere in that new relaxed homeschooling life of ours I found out about unschooling and really liked what  I read.  I tried to put into practice the new ideas I was learning about.  However, since it took years for me to really understand unschooling, I didn't do as much as I could have and really wish I could start all over again.  I am thankful, though, that I did make some changes because it really improved our relationships - all of our relationships.  And as I continue to learn more - even though we aren't homeschooling, anymore - I find that as I try to live what I learn - our relationships with each other and even other people in our lives continue to get better.

Most of what I have learned has been from reading Sandra Dodd's writings and postings on her e-list.  Pam Sorooshian has also written a lot that has influenced my life.  I am very thankful that they have chosen to share their lives and that their children have agreed to share their lives, because I have learned so much and have a much better understanding of learning and relationships because of their sharing.